The woes of modern dating have been well-documented, but Asheville’s dating scene is its own animal. Local comedian Cayla Clark has capitalized on the unique oddities of the area in her viral commentaries on Asheville dating culture. In her videos, she roasts everyone from the “super outdoorsy” and “niche small business owner” to the “astrologically-inclined.”
The humor found an audience, and Cayla racked up hundreds of thousands of views on Instagram.
In December, she “created one specific reel that was just digging on Asheville,” she told BPR. The video got “a lot of traction” – more than 500,000 views – “and I was like, okay, so this is what people want to see,” she said. Clark has been “making fun of this lovely town” ever since.
“I mean it's been really fun for me because I have just like a wealth of stupid ideas,” she said. “It's really nice that people are able to see me be myself and it's nice that people are receptive to my sense of humor.”
Clark admits that many of the “Asheville tropes” she makes fun of in her videos, like “the crystal tarot card people” and “sage burners,” are traits that she shares, too.
“After maybe two years of being here, all of the sudden I have seven tarot decks. I'm burning sage in the morning and I'm like, 'Oh, okay. So I have become Asheville. I’m integrated,'” she joked.
Clark uses the quirky characters a suitor may come across in their search for love in Asheville. She draws inspiration from her own “messy” experiences, along with stories her friends have shared, she told BPR.
“It's really horrible out there, really rough out there,” Clark said of the time she spent looking for love through online dating apps like Tinder, Hinge, and Bumble.
Clark is now happily in a relationship with someone she met “organically,” she said, and he sometimes stars in her videos.
For her part, Clark acknowledged her contributions to the dating scene haven’t always been great.
“I was single when I moved to Asheville. And I was on the apps. It's kind of interesting because I was the problem, admittedly, and for certain alcoholism is part of my story,” she said. “When I first moved here… I was doing a lot of drunk dating and just really ruining people’s vibes.”
With more than a year and half of sobriety under her belt, Clark creates social media content for a sober recovery organization, Guardian Recovery.
One of her most popular videos “POV: You’re on a date with someone ‘from Asheville’,” pokes fun at locals who tend to act “non-committal” and demonstrate “superficial spirituality,” Clark said.
“There's a lot of ‘here for a good time, not a long time' mentality, which isn't a bad thing,” she continued. “People want what they want. But most of the people that I work with are like hey, I really want to find a life partner and I have no idea where to look.”
A new way to date in Asheville?
In response to the dating woes, Clark and her friends at Double Dip Productions started a dating show called Blind Date Live last May. The show encourages suitors to depart from – in her words – the “tragic swiping” of the modern dating scene and meet people in real life.
“Everyone is so plugged into their phones, their devices, their apps, and everything that I’ve found people don't know how to sit down and have a conversation anymore,” she said. “I hope to help remind people that human interaction is pretty much the most important part of dating.”
The dating show puts blindfolded suitors on stage between a partition, while Clark and her co-host Bishop ask them questions about everything from family values and hobbies to sexual preferences in front of a live audience.
“I've heard a lot of people say dating has been traumatic for them,” she said. “But I think approaching it from a silly, lighthearted standpoint can be beneficial. It kind of takes the pressure off.”
Clark vets each candidate in advance of the show to make sure they are “dateable” and would make a good potential match for one of the other suitors. She said she has one-on-one meetings to check for red flags or incompatibilities.
“I sit down with everybody who applies and have an in-person conversation so I can tell if people are really who they say,” she said. “Maybe they still have a little more work to do on themselves before they're ready to date. So I do a lot of judging people's character for sure.”
Each on-stage date goes individually and three couples per show go on a trial date. At the end of the date, participants have the choice to go on a second date. If couples choose to do a second date, local business sponsors foot the bill.
Blind Date Live’s next event is Valentine’s Day, Feb. 14, at The Grey Eagle. The event kicks off with a social mixer at 6:30 p.m., with the main show starting at 8 p.m.
Interested in getting on stage? Send Blind Date Live a message on Instagram.
